User:Archer OaZ

Biography

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Archer was blessed with two last names, Because why? His dad hated him. Moving on.

Early Life

Archer has been a great disappointment to his father, mother, brother, sister, that loan officer who gave him a great rate for his student loan that I never paid, his first wife, and that guy that wanted to hold his hand wile in the bathroom.

Archer thought to himself. "Been seven years old sucks the left thumb of a rancor right hand".(BTW That's the hand that Rancores use to wipe there bums with.) On His twelfth birthday he desired to be stronger faster and more powerful then any one in the whole galaxy! Two weeks later he wanted to be a Nurf herder, because "They had an awesome union with excellent health benefits". Wile at his birthday party of his sixteenth birthday he realized, "Why have excellent health benefits when I can be a excellent health benefit." As previously stated before his father hated him and wanted him to join the family business of Bantha breeding. Before you think "Whats wrong with that?" Think about how you got to get sperm from a Bantha. Yea its sick people SICK. And when he told his father that he wanted to be a doctor, Archers father chased his around the room with a vile of Bantha sperm screaming "Serenity now Serenity now!"

Without the support of his loving family, he went to medical school. Running up all sorts of debt, only a small part of it was from medical school. Girls cost allot of money, smart girl cost more. Just ask any one who has been married. Archer found himself a job as a ambulance driver. Your thinking "Wow Neato! You get to save peoples lifes". Nothing was farther then the truth. Archer hauled geriatrics from one hospital to another and they never shut up. "My Son loves me. He visited me twice last year" or "I'm bleeding out my anus!" Blah Blah Blah "My diaper is full of poo"

"Who cares your son just paid me to chuck your ass out of a air lock So I am not changing your poo." Thats right some guy named Uebles paid Archer a lot of money to toss his dad's ass out of an air lock. When Questioned about it in brake room he stated "What?! I have bills. And his candy was sooooo good." --Archer OaZ 00:40, 1 May 2011 (GMT)